Manifesting: Mirrors, Magic, and Masturbation

This is actually the title of one of the workshops (Mirrors, Magic, and Masturbation) at Sex Down South Conference. I didn’t attend that workshop but I liked the title so I decided to use for this post.

When I was primary school-age, my grandparents had a mirror mounted in the kitchen. Every evening I’d get to the table before all my cousins so I could sit and glance intermittently at my reflection as I ate dinner. This seat also happened to be at the head of the table.

I don’t recall how long I did this before my great-grandmother banned me from this seat and told me that I was “stuck on myself”. There was truth in that. I see that now. Back then, I was obsessed with mirrors; very little has changed.

I used mirrors to look at all parts of my body and not just my face. In the evenings, my grandmother would complain about how long I was taking in the bathroom. If you guessed it was because I was busy ‘looking up my ass’ as my grandmother called it, you’re absolutely right.

In school, I was always the girl you could ask for a mirror. I’d carry around those round compact mirrors that I never paid for…mirrors seemed to find me everywhere. There’s more to it than that though. I was manifesting MIRRORS.

When I was in college, I hung multiple mirrors in my dorm room. It was the first thing people noticed when they walked in. My first apartment had mirrors as the closet doors and I still bought more mirrors.

I once visited a friend in high school and there were mirrors everywhere in her house. She said, “Yeah, my mom loves mirrors.” And I thought, “When I get a place, I’m going to do this in my place.” I did.

My great-grandmother was right. I was certainly stuck on my-Self.

Mirrors are portals to magical realms. I knew that even before I knew that. Often times I’d stare into the mirror with intention…unaware of what those intentions were…didn’t make them any less powerful. I was manifesting beautiful thoughts of myself and didn’t even realize it.

I am a Master Manifestor.

As an adolescent, I’d sit on the bed with the soles of my feet together, prop a mirror there, and begin to open the floral folds of my pussy, exploring mySelf as I stare in amazement at the reflection.

Even then I knew my pussy was magical.

There was nothing sexual about that touch. There were simply the thoughts, “This is so fucking cool; Is this really mine? I wonder what it can do.”

I’d been touching myself for years. To see and touch me and watch me as I touch me was an entirely new level of elevation. I was manifesting PLEASURE. I have had quite an abundance of that and to be totally honest, it’s one of those things I live for….Its one of those “if I could have that one more time before I die” type of things.

Earlier I told you that mirrors are portals to magical realms…as are pussies. Do you see where I’m going here? It’s totally ok if you don’t. Because you know I’m going to continue my story either way.

Even from a teenager, I have had an amazingly pleasant, pleasure-filled journey with my many partners. And as I listen to so much of the traumas that my sisters have been through in their sexual journeys (that I can absolutely relate to) I am so thankful for the beautiful perspective of my own journey. No doubt this message came from mySelf. I was manifesting this EXPERIENCE.

I hadn’t realized.

I was 28 years old experiencing a divorce when I began to recognize I was manifesting my DESIRES…not me though…mySelf.

Also, I and mySelf are not separate. One is just subconscious and therefore woke as fuck. They teach you that the subconscious is asleep; declare that it is awake. Know that the subconscious is awake and playing a vital role in your being-ness even as you may be unaware. So don’t worry, you’ll always be exactly where you’re supposed to be.

Lots of people were sure the divorce was all my ex husband’s fault. After all he was the one having extra-marital affairs, being disrespectful, and violent. Shortly there after the separation, I met a person that I fell in love with instantly. I knew I had been the one to cause this experience.

While talking to a friend of mine, I confessed that I had not been happy in my marriage and that I’d just been pretending to save face. Truth…I pined for love and pleasure, something I always had, had suddenly been gone with two simple words, “I do.”

When I was married, my thoughts would often start like this, “Once this is over…” Sad, I know.

It was here that I recognized my MAGIC.

I broke free so that I could discover that love and pleasure I’ve become so attached to. Once I recognized my power, I begin imagining all of the things I could possibly manifest. It was everything I needed to focus and practice.

Manifesting through mirrors and masturbation is a regular practice for me. It is indeed a magical journey. My practice is insatiably sensual and intelligently intimate. MySelf knows me better than I could ever know mySelf. It is here in the climax of my self-induced orgasm that I relinquish all that I Am to mySelf. To gain control, you must indeed let go.

Today, I have this special mirror…it’s heavy. It reminds me of the mirror over the kitchen table at my granny’s house. The frame is gold. I prop it against the wall in the hallway of my place as I lean against the opposite wall. I watch myself touching myself and sometimes I record myself watching myself touching myself as I rock back and forth manifesting through mirrors, magic, and masturbation.

Making magic with Mirrors and Masturbation

Yes, the mirror matters. Not as much as you do. Special mirrors have special effects and special may vary. The more sentiment you attach to the mirror, the more powerful it becomes. This becomes even more powerful when there is not physical attachment to the mirror. That way the object does not have power over you…see…let go.

I’m a bit frugal. I am also nostalgic. The mirror I use reminds me of my childhood and I thrifted it. Now, that is special to me.

I’m not going to tell you to strip naked and start playing with your pussy. You might not be there yet. Start slow…if you need to…and if you’re unsure, ask your-Self and trust that answer.

Sit in front of the mirror everyday with all your clothes on, perhaps a favorite outfit, that may help you feel beautiful or sensual and simply ask yourSelf, “Who am I?” Do that everyday until you are comfortable removing some of your clothing. Touch your exposed skin. Watch yourself touching yourself. Pay attention to the thoughts that populate your mind. Decide if you’d like to change those thoughts. Note whether you love those thoughts.

Do this everyday, removing more and more clothing each day asking yourself only one question, “Who am I?” Don’t answer it though. The answer is already there. Keep a journal of your thoughts, feelings, and changes each day.

Dance in your mirror. Have a conversation with yourself…speak objectively about what you see, speak sensually about what you see, speak candidly about what you see, speak kindly about what you see…love on yourself. Make this experience unique to you.

Here are some things I say to myself:

You so fine.
I’m so fly.
You are so amazing.
I love mySelf.
Hey, Beautiful.

When you’re ready, cultivate the space you need to allow your fingers to explore nonsexually…If it turns sexual wonderful….if it doesn’t just as well.

When you’re ready.

Pretty Pink Lotus Bud for sex-positive spaces; #WomensOrgasmMatter; the sexually liberated woman, proheaux, sex magic

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3 Reasons to Masturbate Beyond Pleasure

How can a person be an advocate for women’s orgasms and not be an advocate for masturbation? Short answer. You can’t.

Lately, I’ve been talking a lot about masturbation and that’s no coincidence.

First, the theme for round one’s summer 100 is masturbation and self-pleasure. And ever since I took part in the 30-day orgasm fun, I’ve learned so much about masturbation and I love sharing these things with y’all.

What is the purpose of masturbating? So many reasons, right? I’m sure many of us can agree that masturbation is a very pleasurable experience. Here are three more reasons to masturbate beyond just pleasure.

Self-Exploration

During the 30-day orgasm fun, I learned that not all toys are created equally. Many of them are really simple to use, while others require a bit more practice. No worries, because I’ve also learned that such toys present the opportunity to spend time deliberately getting to know your body as you master the use of this pleasure inducing device better known as the sex toy.

As I mentioned in Touch of Self-Love, I have been masturbating for a very long time. Even as that is true I know that there is still so much to learn about my ever-evolving sexual body. The first time I used a toy that wasn’t so straightforward I got super frustrated. As I navigated the toys over my clitoris, I’d find a good spot and then I lose it. Highly frustrational.

I was not having any orgasm fun at all. I felt like I just wanted to throw it against the wall. I had read so many rave reviews. I just wanted it to perform for me the way it did for its reviewers. In the midst of my frustration and a masturbation session that was asking well over 12 minutes, I took a deep breath and decided I try again later that week. In the meantime, I chose a different toy to finish things off.

When I used the toy again later that week I was surprised at how much better the experience was going compared to when I first used it. Through the use of other toys, I had been exploring more with my physical pleasure. Once you can master your own body, you can master almost any decent toy.

Exploring yourself, including through masturbation, is important to your self-care and unlocking your magic. Eliminating shame is also a key to unlocking your magic. There’ll be a post on this soon.

Healing and Self-Care

Often we hear about meditation, therapy, baths, and yoga as a part of self-care. Well, let’s add masturbation to that list. As Ani can tell you, self-care is more than just manicures and girls night out. Self-care is indeed a way of life.

I take pride in my masturbation experience. And before it became a thing of sexual pleasure, it was purely for the purpose of relaxation. As a child, I had a lot of anxiety. I’m still figuring out why that is or what that means. Anyway, masturbation has helped me a lot through that anxious period in my life.

I never got over that anxiety, for the most part, I just learned to suppress it and masturbating allowed me to relax my anxiety away. The truth is masturbation is like my security blanket. It helps me relax; it helps me sleep. Masturbation puts me in a meditative state of sorts. And when I’m in this state, I express myself more creatively. I’m more comfortable and open to exploration, especially spiritually.

It didn’t take me long through all of this relaxation, connection, openness, and creativity to recognize I was healing myself. Through this conscious and physical act of self-exploration and self-pleasure. I witnessed a rise in my confidence and the release of stress and fear that was manifesting in the form of depression. Now, this has not been through masturbation alone, however, masturbation has acted as a strong catalyst on my healing journey.

Sex Magick

When you encounter something powerful that helps you connect and release you better believe magical things are happening. Sex, in many ways, is a spiritual practice for me. With its anatomical location in the pelvic plexus, the root chakra and sex is linked to creativity, passion, and desire. It is the base, the foundation of our spiritual evolution. It is associated with feeling safe and grounded. No wonder it helps so much with my anxiety.

The root chakra, which is where we house our ideas and feels about sex, provides the foundation on which we build our life.

It supports us in growing and feeling safe into exploring all the aspects of life. It is related to our feeling of safety and security, whether it’s physical or regarding our bodily needs or metaphorical regarding housing and financial safety. To sum it up, the first chakra questions are around the idea of survival and safety. The root chakra is where we ground ourselves into the earth and anchor our energy into the manifest world.

Chakras.info

If there are any energy blockages happening in your root chakra, masturbation absolutely helps you release them. Once things are balanced, this is when the real magic happens. It’s like the difference between one of those fake plastic trees and a tree with actual roots. It is the difference between existing in the world as we are told and being free to grow, change, and evolve in the way we were designed.

Real trees produce fruit; those fruits produce seeds; seeds produce more trees. Masturbation can be and for me it very much is the key to manifesting my desires and creativity in the physical.

In this way, you get to decide what that tree will become. Sex Magick is very powerful and precise. It is my preferred form of practical magick. Through balance and development, it becomes as easy as thinking a simple thought channeled by your desire, your passion, and your creativity.

I have not mastered sex magic. I assure you I’m well on my way which is the best part because I’m in such a place of discovery and exploration. So much is new to me and I teach as I learn.

Pretty Pink Lotus Bud for sex-positive spaces; #WomensOrgasmMatter; the sexually liberated woman, proheaux, sex magic

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