The Joys of Fellatio blog series on PrettyPinkLotusBud.org

Welcome back. Yesterday in the Words Unspoken post I talked about why I had never spoken the words “I Love Giving Head.” A lot of if has to do with slut-shaming and misogyny surrounding feminine sexuality. Make sure you check it out if you missed it.

Learning the Ropes

My very first memory of giving head was such a wonderful one which is likely a contributing factor to why I enjoy it so much today. This guy was unlike any other I’d ever been with. Although at the time, that wasn’t very many at all. There was not a place on my body that he considered off limits for his hands or mouth. He was doing rimjobs before it was even “a thing” and I was here for it all yet I didn’t even know it until the moment he did them. From oral to anal to exhibitionism and his sexy foot fetish, he opened me up to a flood of new sexual experience leading me to discover that I am a mermaid. Not a fish out of water at all. . .

Ready and Willing

He loved to face plant in my pussy; whether he loved it or he loved the way I loved it, I’m still not sure. One day he asked me if I enjoyed giving head. I said yeah even though I had never done it before. I certainly wanted to. I was willing. I was ready. I’m a “try anything once” kinda girl. If I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t do it again; simple as that. However that was certainly not the case. I loved it and so did he. I was a natural, born to do this, pro status on my debut kind of woman. I took him in like a breath of fresh air.

He would tell me that some girls acted like they didn’t like it even when they did. I knew what he meant. Some girls I’d known who enjoyed it were embarrassed to admit it out of fear of slut-shaming or a feeling of obligation that I mentioned in Words Unspoken.

Student and the Master

He could tell I enjoyed it and that made him enjoy it even more. He taught me so much about how to give [him] great head. Tips and techniques that I learned worked well on almost any man. He taught me to wiggle my ass when giving head and how to rock my head back and forth as I moved it in and out of my mouth. He taught me the one and the two hand twist and how to take it far back without gagging, but that gagging was cool too because it produced more saliva. And he always reminded me to watch my teeth. Most importantly, he taught me how to communicate my own desires, which can sometimes seem unwelcomed in the sexual arena as Amelia explains in her article, How to talk about sex more playfully. I recall that he’d scold me when I wouldn’t tell him that I wasn’t enjoying something, saying, “How am I supposed to know if you don’t tell me?”

I could tell that teaching me was sometimes frustrating for him but nevertheless rewarding. I’ve always been good at following instructions well.

He had me watching a Karrine “Supahead” Steffans porn video once. As Kristen will tell you, porn is not sex ed. I am also keenly against using porn as a source of education when it comes to sex but I must admit this works for guys. Probably because lots of guys have watched videos of her I’m sure.

Making Magic


I loved giving him head. I loved pleasing him orally because he made great efforts to please me in that very same way. That still holds true for me today regardless of who I’m with. Being self-less during intercourse is one of the sexiest things a person can be to me. I am more willing to give when I see that great efforts are made in giving to me. This is when the magic happens.

Thanks for reading today’s post. In tomorrow’s post, The Anatomy of Passion, I plan to talk about how my desire turned into an obsession of power and the joy I derived from making guys weak at the knee with my “oral fixation”. Remember to subscribe.

Sex positive & body positive blog, Subscribe for a fresh perspective on sex, relationships, & spirituality while dismantling sexual social constructs.

Did you enjoy this post?

Leave a comment below & share this post with your tribe.

Subscribe Now for the Latest Updates