Can Sex Be Spiritual? 

It is often questioned whether sex can be spiritual. Well, I am here to set the record straight, once and for all. No, sex cannot be spiritual. Sex is spiritual. Every single act of sex is spiritual. Mindful acts of sex are high energy spiritual experiences. Less mindful acts (coerced, forced, passive, obligatory etc.) are low energy spiritual experiences.

Believe it or not, we have the exact same high and low energy experiences with every other act we perform: eating, grooming, daily tasks, raising our children. Even something as simple as walking is experienced as high or low energy. You ever notice how much more confident you feel with a raised head and little switch in your hip? Maybe it’s just me. This is why self-care and self-compassion is so important.

In the realm of what is spiritual and what is not, sex is no different than any other act. What is different is our cultural perspective. Sex is however, experienced at a different energetic frequency but this doesn’t make it better or worse, just different. Like light and sound, one travels faster but neither is more spiritual than the other. Each has its own role to play. Like running compared to walking, you’ll cover five miles faster running than walking however, you cover the exact same distance with either.

This has been my experience with sex and spirituality.

Transcending Shame

On my current spiritual journey, I kept running into spiritual blockages. It was frustrating and mildly discouraging. I wasn’t sure what the issue was; then suddenly it became clear. FEAR; what was I afraid of; what of myself was I holding back? I had renounced dis-serving cultural beliefs, acknowledged my spiritual gifts, and began exploring my own truth and creating a custom experience around that truth. So, what was missing? Something definitely felt missing.

Then one day a friend of mine, whom I had not spoken with in some time, asked me a very simple question. He asked, what I had done over my summer break. All of the wonderfully, euphoric memories came flooding back however, I was hesitant to provide him with a true answer. But why? And there was the answer to my spiritual blockage.

I had been afraid of the judgment and shame that accompanies those epic acts that I had the privilege of taking part in over the summer. I had not fully accepted myself as the sensual goddess that I know myself to be and was thus afraid of presenting this sexually liberated woman to others. I knew that I no longer wanted to be a prisoner of my own fear so I told him everything I had done over the summer. I told him that I had been hesitant to reveal this to him and I also explained why. His response was beautiful, reassuring, encouraging and quite inspiring; a message directly from spirit. I receive it.

Shortly afterwards, I started the Pretty Pink Lotus Bug blog to be a beacon of courage to guide others on their spiritual journey of unabashed sexual exploration; to embrace their sexuality, and redefine what it means for them.

Just recently, I visited my good friend Bree to have an oracle reading done that truly spoke to my spiritual awakening and sexual reveal. The cards spoke directly to severing ties with old beliefs and relationships that do not serve my journey as well as embracing the sexual being that I am (going with the flow) and discovering inner peace. My final card said, “Stand tall, don’t give up”, a highly reassuring message. If you are interested in learning more about her readings, I encourage you to visit MagicallyBree.com. Let her know I sent you.

Sexual Debris

We often speak of or see memes floating around the Internet regarding the exchange of toxic energy when engaging in sexual intercourse. These memes often present the idea that energy exchange through intercourse is more menacing than other forms of exchange and that we should be more careful and limit our engagement in energy exchange of the sexual type.

This doesn’t resonate as my personal truth.

sex and spirituality

Any energy exchange, including toxic energy, can happen under a variety of circumstances, not just sex, not necessarily more with sex, but it can definitely happen faster through intercourse. As a clairsentient empath, I know that we exchange and absorb energy from others without ever coming into physical contact with them.

Often you can limit or manage the exchange but we cannot prevent it whether we are having sex with a person or simply sharing an office space at our place of employment. Because of our social conditioning, we like to convince ourselves that there is a difference however, that is not fact. Simply put, you may claim it as your personal truth however; it is not a universal truth and should not be dictated to others.

Here, I’ll give you an example from my own life, unrelated to sex.

My marriage was a toxic and abusive relationship. Once my family discovered this, they quickly encouraged me to leave even though I had no income, no job, and essentially no other place to live.

A few years later, I was employed by a toxic and abusive employer. Even so, friends and family discouraged me from leaving out of the necessity for a source of income to care for my children.

From a cultural perspective, I get it. We are encouraged to leave toxic romantic relationships and tough it out with toxic employers at least until we find another option. From a spiritual perspective, it made absolutely no sense to be encouraged to leave one toxic relationship yet remain in another because of the cultural context when they both have the ability to inflict an equal level of harm from a psychological perspective and result in similar consequences (even when we tell ourselves otherwise).

For me, this scenario applies to sex and sexuality as well. The depth to which we are affected by certain experiences is highly influenced by our cultural perception. Declare that your spiritual perception vibrates higher than your cultural perception and it will be so.

It’s not about being careful about whom you exchange energy with, sexual or otherwise, it’s about learning to limit, manage, and discharge toxic energy effectively. Regardless of how it originated, this needs to happen across all social interactions and not just sex.

Am I telling you to be more promiscuous and engage in sex in a way that you wouldn’t usually? Not at all, unless that is what you feel compelled to do. I am telling you that one form of energy exchange is not more important than the other. Having fewer partners does not give you the increased ability to attract a more positive spiritual experience just has having more or multiple partners does not decrease this ability as we are often guided to believe.

We carry spiritual debris from all forms of social interaction simply because we do not discharge it appropriately. We must take care in all forms of energy exchange and not give sexual intercourse such a hard rep when it comes to aural energy. The law of attraction works the same with sex as it does with all other nonsexual acts regardless of your number of partners. Focus on the negative and that is what you will receive. Channel the positive and that is what you will meet completely unrelated to how many people you have or haven’t had sex with.

Culturally, we have taken on a very negative perspective when it comes to sex, and it is time for us to relinquish this dangerously self-critical perspective. Such a limited perspective of sexuality invalidates the experience of non-monogamous individuals. Know that these and other restrictions on our spiritual essence is simply the human mind’s way of making sense of its own reality by attempting to confine unbridled divinity.

Human is your form. Spirit is who you are. Sex is spiritual. I encourage you to embrace who you are in your current form and inevitably you shall transcend it.

This post was originally posted on House of Hathor. You can view the original post by following the link provided.

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The Myth of the Slut

Long ago when matriarchy ruled as patriarchy does today, men competed for the affection, attention, and approval of women. Women were worshiped and the Goddess ruled the heavens. Women had reign to choose any man they desired to fulfill their most imaginative fantasies. The most physically and sexually capable of the bunch were always top choice.

Men had no power

Men had to justify their existence, for they had very little importance beyond their ability to fertilize female eggs and move heavy objects. They were very much like worker ants and bees. They did the heavy physical labor, and made sure that children were produced and protected. (Walsch, 41)

Women would hold lavish ceremonies. They danced, chanted, ate, drank, and sat in prayer and meditation to bestow gratitude upon the Goddess for her love and abundance. During these ceremonies, each woman would spend time have sex with various men she felt an attraction to in order to select a suitable well-endowed, handsome, and physically capable strong mate who would bring her great pleasure and healthy children. The women would dress in almost nothing to seduce the men, who proudly walked about naked and erect, and observed how they measured up.

These ceremonies would last from the fall of the full moon until the rise of the new. Women participated in duos, trios, and group experiences of multiple orgasmic pleasure. Their climaxes could be heard for miles. The women even indulged in bringing one another pleasure while others watched on. Sex during this time was not a private act nor was it an objective act. These acts were the purest expression of boundless, authentic love. To do it openly and often was to pay homage to the Goddess.

Several offspring were born of these rituals with no concern of whom the father might be. All the men participated equally in the protection and rearing of the children. It was an amazing celebration of sexual pleasure and spiritual connection as they worshiped the Goddess of the Yoniverse.

It was indulgently wonderful, except everyone did not get to enjoy these ceremonies. Only the strongest, most handsome, empathetic, and intelligent of the men were invited.

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Overthrown

Unfortunately, not all men measured up. These men became bitter and resentful. They began plotting to reverse the roles. After centuries, of playing the subservient role of meat suppliers, the men finally convinced the women to give them more power, but those men became greedy. They began to spread rumors of the Goddess having given birth to an evil son (later known as the devil) who planned to overthrow the spiritual kingdom and the male God was brought forth for protection.

As time passed, the rumors began to grow. The Goddess pledged her loyalty to God, forsaking all others. Women began to follow Her example as it was their ultimate desire to be all that the Goddess was. Many women knew this was a trick and continued to follow the original ways of the Goddess. The men could not let this happen. They could not allow the women to realize their divine essence and reclaim their power over men. Fearing the loss of their own power, the men turned to social manipulation. Women who refused to pledge their loyalty to one man, acting out in rebellion, were shamed into conformity. Thus, the slut came into being. The Goddess soon disappeared from worship altogether.

Myth and Magic

Women were socially ostracized and physically punished for being with more than one man. Social constructs were invented to define virginity (the hymen story). Sex in exchange for goods and services, once seen as a lavishly, prestigious role performed by the most seductive women, was given derogatory labels (whore and prostitution) and declared illegal. Women’s breasts were regarded as obscene. Female genitalia and pregnancy out of wedlock became a source of cultural shame. Social suppression of sexual desires turned into self-suppression of sexual desires; All invented to control women’s sexuality and prevent their reemergence to magnificence alongside the Goddess.

So you see, the slut is a myth, no more real than Sasquatch or the Loch Ness monster. Although, like Sasquatch and the Loch Ness monster, some people still believe she exists. Slut is a shameful label given to magical women, the boldest and the bravest of us all. In truth, slut is the essence of a woman rekindling her spiritual beingness as a sexual goddess; doing her due diligence to unlock the treasures of her deepest desires rendering her worthy of becoming one with the true Goddess once more. The one labeled slut is a woman who recognizes her freedom to pursue her sexual potential and all the wonderful pleasure it brings.

Sluts are like Unicorns; although they do not exist, they represent something quite rare and truly magical.

 

References
Nagoski, Emily. Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life. Simon & Schuster Paperbacks, 2015.

Walsch, Neale Donald. Conversations with God: An uncommon dialogue book 3. Hampton Roads Publishing Company, 1998.

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