Sex positive and body positive blog, Subscribe to PrettyPinkLotusBud.org for a refreshing perspective on sex, relationships, and spirituality. Tearing down social constructs one patriarchal perspective at a time.

Love doesn’t hurt it is the things we associate with love that hurts us.

Monogamy = commitment = faithful = love

This is the assumed equation when it comes to love. However in my experience, it is an equation that is lacking dynamically. Can not one who is polyamorous also be committed, faithful, and in love…Indeed, they are the most loving that I know.

The truth is we, more often than not, use love to dominate, possess, control, and manipulate.

If you love me you would…

you would be…  you would do…
If only you loved me enough.

I assure you, love is enough.

Love is not property. One cannot just decide how it behaves, when it behaves, or who it behaves or mistakenly labeled “misbehaves” with.

Love cannot be possessed.

Love is whimsical. Love is wild. Love is free…Attempts to tame it will only bring you torment…Why torture yourself?

Love is not some physical entity that can be owned, bought, sold, or traded on a whim. Love is like the wind.

Love is a weightless sphere, an orb, with mass, surface, layers, depth, and diameter. At any perspective from which you are examining it, you are not seeing its entire part. Love is a whole we often use to fill holes. Don’t get me wrong, love is very capable of filling holes, thus making one heal whole, just not in the ways we seek to do so.

Love leads by example.

When we hurt the ones we love, it is not because we don’t love them. Perhaps it may be because we’ve had poor, poor examples of love.

Most times we are not hurt by any direct act at all but rather by our own expectations for the people we love, and by our lack of accountability for those expectations. It seems much easier to blame rather than take responsibility for the true cause of our self-inflicted pain.

Love is perfect…human beings  are not. Falling in love does not render one imperfect being suddenly perfect. Instead, it renders them capable of perfection through acceptance.

Accept love as it is, formless and fluid in its imperfect package.

Charlotte Kasl, author of “if the Buddha date” said that falling in love, which is kind of like falling out of your neocortex into your more primitive instincts, can feel euphoric.

She says that, “When we “fall in love” and project the image of The Perfect One onto our new love interest, it implies that we are incomplete the way we are.” She advises that when this happens, “Go inside yourself and ask, What crazy expectations am I feeding myself?” She encourages the reader to, “Bring yourself back to the present, peel away your expectations, and look at the mortal before you.”

Love without expectations, without exception, without exclusion.

It is the most liberating feeling in life.

Did you enjoy this post?

Let me know your thoughts in the comments & share this with your friends.

Subscribe Now for the Latest Updates